Classical Guitar - Lesson #4

I started to think that guitar is very hard to learn! argh! very hard... my fingers T.T it's been a month! i'm not going to give you up damn guitar! lol! haha.. my left hand fingers are suffering but i like the pain.. anyway i can't feel the pain on my second and fourth finger anymore. today was my fourth lesson, hmm... teacher said i need more practice.. we failed to play duet fluently every time we were about to, i guess that's because i got nervous up every time we played duet! argh! why? because when i play alone i feel ok.. anyway, he gave me some homework, there's few song i need to practice, even though i practice every day but i used around 30 to 45 minutes to practice only, i have time constraint. i need to add up my playing tempo, some songs are slightly higher tempo.. but my fingers -.- zzzzzzz give or take how many months more can i play more fluently? sigh! がんばってください!

p/s: i'm having diet and practicing guitar at the same time =)

爸爸的心声

今天爸爸和我说心事。听了之后我才发现爸爸原来很爱妈妈因为爸爸很疼妈妈，就算自己受委屈也往肚子里吞。然后就觉得妈妈很自私！我妈妈表面上会替我们想但实际上她很多时候只替自己想只是看她打麻将就知道了。她可以为了打麻将忘记了一个妈妈和一个母亲的责任，这个让我最最接收不到。最可恶的是她还要倒反过来责怪我们。很多时候对着他我真的无话可说。妈妈对她自己亲生的儿女特别疼爱，但是除了我之外她很偏心她他别疼大哥哥。在她眼里无论他做了什么就算不对也是对的。妈妈只想到自己的儿子女儿但从来没有想过爸爸的儿女，还天天煽风点火间接离间他们之间的感情。虽然他们当中有两个人没有对我妈妈好但是毕竟也是后母，难道全天下的后母都是这样吗？当初生活很贫困的时候大哥哥在中国因为没有工作所以整天想我们借钱，接了没有还。爸爸今天告诉我去年向他借钱妈妈却逼爸爸还。爸爸觉得很心痛因为他觉得为什么人家借了他的钱就不用还但是向这位借钱不还钱的人借钱却要还。而且爸爸最最心痛的是当爸爸想要那一笔钱出来帮助他现在有难的儿子的时候妈妈却一脸不欢喜，这一点令我爸爸很伤心因为他觉得他是应分帮自己的儿子却无能为力没有应分帮别人的儿子却一点都没有帮少。很可笑吧？由于很自己的儿女疏远了甚至没有联络，爸爸就只剩我一个了。突然觉得爸爸很孤单所以我一定要住在家里。我很爱妈妈也很爱爸爸但当我今天听了爸爸的心事后我就觉得妈妈对于整件有连接的事情都很不公平而且非常的自私。我当然就是那个从小到大左右为难的人了~

My Lover

I'm engaged to my guitar, I just named it Beethoven.. it's my true first love. I'm gonna treasure it a lot =) Just now I accidentally hit it backboard on the table, my heart ache for a while. I will never let it happens again =( Dear Beethoven, I love you~

Stop Treating Me Like a Kid

I really hate I when they still treat me like a kid which can't do anything or help anything. ya. maybe I am financially but my thinking is far more than that. well they made me become a person who doesn't care much around me because when something happen to the person around me I would never care as I think it's not of my business people can settle anything by themselves. sigh. I really really hate it when they doesn't tell me anything. I mean how old am I! do I still need to live like this forever? do I still need to live like a kid forever? damn it! it's not that I don't wanna flee this place and go somewhere else. it's just that I really want to be with them while I can! please don't treat me like a kid. coz I'm not. I have proven in any way I can but for the thing you guys have done to me I cannot do anymore to further prove myself! I know being a matured grown up doesn't need to be proven because people can see it by their own eyes. but they chose not to see it. in their eyes I'm forever that small little girl. what am I supposed to do? sigh.

Classical Guitar - Lesson #3

Today was my 3rd lesson.. learned to play chord today, for a beginner it's quite hard to master.. Argh.. my fingertips are quite painful. i can feel the numbness.. but i'm not going to give up easily.. i'm gonna practice and practice and practice =) haha.. i know C chord, Em Chord and G7 Chord but G7 is super hard because my fingers are too short i almost cannot reach the E string.. -.- when my third finger reaches E string, i have to hold my first finger on the first e string which i have to use some energy to do so, the harder i hold my finger on the first the more painful my fingertip is.. but if i didn't hold harder, everything will be out of tone.. it's not really easy..especially when i have to play with a higher tempo.. phew..

加油加油加油！

今天练吉他练得比较频密手指头有点疼〜呵呵这就是效果啊！我就是要这种痛*\(^o^)/* 我会继续努力的！多几个月等家里的事情都安定下来了我就要报名学钢琴。我要把我从小到大的＂想学＂的愿望一一在我还有能力的时候实现！我已经爱上我的吉他了（＾Ｏ＾☆♪ 钢琴当然也是我的挚爱咯〜 虽然还没学但在很久以前我已经爱上钢琴了♪( ´▽｀) 没想到到我这把年纪才来学音乐、呵呵！我会努力了你们也给打打气吧！がんばってください！☆*:.｡. o(≧▽≦)o .｡.:*☆

永远怀念你们！

今天是日本大地震一周年，我在此也祝福那些不幸在此灾难当中牺牲的朋友们。我想大家在有生之年都忘记不了这件事情。。希望他们会安息。永远怀念你们！

Classical Guitar - Lesson #2

Today was my second lesson, I felt great about it but I made many mistakes while playing the melody sounded like I didn't do any practicing. The truth is I did quite regularly! I practice daily but I made mistake on the easiest song! I can't believe that I got nervous in front of the teacher -.- lol.. maybe I just lack of confidence. Never mind of it, I will do better next time it takes time to get perfect. LOL! haha! I'm looking forward for my 3rd lesson already~ Teacher gives me another week to practice the song so that we can duet this time.. Well, the song is really easy to be played, I just scared I'll get nervous and screw up again -.- WELL, I CAN'T LET THAT HAPPEN AGAIN =) がんばってくだい！

What Happens?

I have this serious problem with him, and my mum has this serious problem with him too. It's not as if I didn't attempt to talk to him openly, I just can't. I just can't open upp to him since he was married. I felt that he's a total stranger to me. Sigh. We're brother and sister in half blood, but I don't feel like we are one with connected blood line. What happens to him? What happens to us? What happens to all of us?

Classical Guitar - Lesson #1

Today was my first week of learning guitar! It was really really really really fun! I couldn't find a word to describe how great it was, though I was just learning the most basic thing, I knew I was already into it completely! =) I love it! I love it! I love it so so much! I can't believe! I can't believe that I'm learning guitar now! Haha! Someone please calm me down.. okay.. shooooo.. shan.. just be calm.......... phew..

Am I just too overexcited? Haha.. I'm looking forward to next week already~ half an hour is really fast.. lol..

I need more practicing on remembering the notes and the frets... the notes are sometimes confusing for people like me.. without any music background. but I will put 100% of my effort on it. HAHA.. Well, maybe 95% sparing another 5% to rest XD

这一次我一定要学会！

明天就是我第一天去学吉他老实说我真的有点紧张呢！
其实我真的很怕我学不会可是我应该没有那么笨吧。。。
我这次是很认真的！我一定要学会！！！！！！！！！！！！

My Musical Adventure Begins - Registration

After several months of thinking through it, I've finally come to the decision. Thank to my friend, Charmaine. We drag each other all the way. I know if I didn't do it today, I wouldn't be able to learn guitar anymore because I know I don't have the courage and all that, especially I'm too shy at my age compared to others. I really hope I'll be able to learn well this time. GUITAR! I can't deny that part of my inspiration come from Sung Ha. Haha! But other than this reason, I think buying a guitar is much more cheaper than piano.

So today I got up with the thought that if Charmaine didn't message me, I will just give it up this week. She ended up remember to message me, so I said yes to go. So we went to 3 places and we ended up in YAMAHA musical school.. A place that I never thought that I will step into forever. Charmaine gave me the courage. Am I too old to learn musical instrument? *shrug* Apparently, the clerk told us that we're not the oldest students after all but I really doubt it.. All I saw with my own eyes are teenagers and kids. I guess I am the oldest before Charmaine. LOL. and soooooooooooooo, I finally own a guitar, a cheap one of course. I guess it's for beginner like me but still it cost me few hundred bucks included the fees and all that. RM100 per month.

Actually, I was long to learn a musical instrument when I was a kid but my parents cannot afford it and given the records that I have given up on learning few other skill like ballet.. and damn hell, I really missed ballet so much.. sigh.. that's the thing I regretted the most I guess. Other than that, I really really want to have some special skills before I'm too old to learn =)

So here begins my first ever musical adventure... Registration and guitar purchasing... BTW, it's classical guitar that I will be learning! I'm super nervous, I really don't know how to read notes! and it seems super complicated!